This is a phrase that frustrates me greatly when I hear this said about a child - and I am not even a parent. I say this in a professional capacity having worked as a SENCO (twice) in mainstream and as a senior leader in an SEMH setting.Working nationally with families and schools, I have lost count of the number of times that I have worked with parents who are at the end of their tether trying to get their child’s setting to understand that they are really not fine at school. Often these are children who are “model students” and comply with expectations around behaviour and produce good work in class. I do understand why some people may not see there is a problem BUT the reality is that they are expending a huge amount of cognitive energy on masking. This is all brain power they cannot use for learning. These are students who need support and understanding in the same way as others who are more overt in how their needs present themselves. Imagine what they could achieve if ALL of their bandwidth was available to them for learning!Constant masking is not sustainable and if the child were an adult, we would be saying they are stressed and potentially even experiencing burnout. We would then be signposting to help and support, identifying strategies to address the needs and advising that they take some time to rest and prioritise their wellbeing. Why is that when it is a child, this often does not seem to be the case.If a child is masking all day and exploding when they go home, they are certainly not “fine in school”. There is a wide range of strategies that you can use to identify and support these students. There are two main things that help students who are masking in this way - strong, positive relationships and sensitivity around the demands placed on them. “Demands” goes far beyond academic, including social, expectations, sensory input and more.I regularly run INSET days on how to support students with SEMH needs, always with a focus on providing tried and tested, practical strategies. These are based on the neuroscience and psychology of behaviour - they “why” behind how the techniques work to help staff really understand and implement them effectively.Please contact me to arrange a FREE 30 minute conversation to plan your INSET day. Bookings made for September - December 2025 will be at current prices if booked before the end of July 2025. There is a menu of ready-to-go modules and bespoke options are also available.Course are all certificated too.<a target="_blank" href="mailto:claire@indigoowlcoachingandconsultancy.co.uk">claire@indigoowlcoachingandconsultancy.co.uk</a><a target="_blank" href="https://www.indigoowlcoachingandconsultancy.co.uk/inset-days">https://www.indigoowlcoachingandconsultancy.co.uk/inset-days</a><img src="https://f.ezycourse.net/3790/cm66vni7t024g7h9nh6wrbaaa.png" alt="image" style="width: 244px; height: auto; cursor: pointer;" draggable="true">

"They are fine at school" but they explode at home. This means they are not fine. SEMH issues, autism, ADHD - pupils are masking and will have unmet needs.

"They are fine at school"...

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"They are fine at school"...

"They are fine at school"...

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